Rant.....

Listening to: Alexisonfire- no transitory

It sucks feeling like you've wasted your time, especially when its something important and expensive like school. I have felt that way latley, actually a series of feelings that led to the feeling of failure or that I didnt try hard enough. I had one shot at school, I spent all my time and money on it, and still have the remnants of a big ass loan to worry about. I've heard lots of stories about people who've spent years in school just to find out that what they were taking "wasnt for them". I dont mean to sound so serious because its not the end of the world but it is something very important to me and I dont really have anything else to fall back on.

One of the worst things about being in the CGanimation/visual effects industry is that nobody cares. Seriously you can never stop learning it to be able to do this shit its very complex and its so much work for something so insignificant like talking animals, or cartoons. Maybe I love cartoons and I'm proud of what I have learned and what I have done so far, but to other people its just silly cartoons. Look at pixars "cars" it took 5+ years to make and cost 125 million$! for a silly cartoon! Another bad thing is not being able to talk about your work with other people. They arent going to care that even though you spent so much time learning a new program just to do Zbrush displacement maps to put on your 400000 polygon model together with bumps and normals and subsurface scattering to find out its all crap now because something better has come out so it is obsolete! people just zone out. So you can see its hard talking about work with other people when you have no remote similarities. Or maybe no one cares at all. I dunno. Its so frustrating I cant do anything maybe ill work at mcdonalds.

I this sounds so strange but I would seriously sell my organs to go back to school. Let me know if someone can hook me up.

so glad to see you once again.....

So I've finally got my shit together and decided to join the blog-bandwagon and I'm going to be completley unoriginal about it. I'm not very good at speaking my thoughts at a computer monitor so bare with me please :) So its snowing out, alot actually and I'm really enjoying it. Its funny cuz the people of BC are very shocked by this phenomena and are killing each other while driving! My old roomate is Australian and she was more prepared to drive in the snow then most other people. I spent some of my childhood and the whole time living in Edmonton in the cold and I really miss it. I know im crazy but seriously Id rather be freezing (which you can cover yourself to be warm) then to be in sweaty sticky heat that even if your naked your still hot and cant do anything about. But thats just me. Plus I love snow :) The one thing that is annoying me though is the boil water advisory here. We cant drink the water or even wash stuff with it. You can still shower but the water smells weird. This has been going on longer then a week. Also I've decided I'm sick of Van so I'm taking an extra-long vacation back home. Yay(Well its not really a vacation since I'll still be working but I will be away!) Van has been stupid. I'm investing to go back for Xmas so it will be an extension of that....

Anyways I cant think of anymore to write. I hope everyone is doing well!
Also I think this scheme is lame I will figure out how to customize it